Reflecting

This past weekend is a sad weekend to be a Penn State alumna; my heart aches for the Paterno family. May Joe be remembered for the many wonderful contributions he made, not just for the great football coach he was; exactly how he wanted it.

One of my fondest memories of JoePa is when he came to my high school to recruit Pat Devlin during my junior year. I was so upset with the thought I didn't have the chance to meet him then, as he has been my idol since I was old enough to understand who he was. Fortunately, my dreams came true that day, and I got to shake his hand. It was totally worth being late to class.

At that point, I'd mainly known him as the Penn State football coach and the man who gave much of his life to the university that I would later attend. Now, I see him as a figure engrained in not only football but academics, as well.. My favorite place to be on campus was the 5th floor in the Paterno Library, the education library After having attended that university for four years, I realize at times I was much too critical about certain aspects. Life there was not all that bad. In fact, it was great.

Life in State College, PA is similar to life here in Cherry Point, NC. Both rural areas built up by one main attraction. Here is Cherry Point, there, Penn State. It also features another aspect of my life that I hold very near and dear to my heart: lifetime friends and support of the community. In Cherry Point, I have my Marine wives who support me through deployments and understand exactly what I'm going through. In State College, I had friends in my classes helping to guide me through my college years.

I didn't realize until this very moment about how similar these two places could actually be. The underlying aspects of life as a military wife and life as a Penn Stater are mainly what ties it together. I am SO proud to be a wife of a Marine, while I'm also proud to be a graduate of Penn State and to have had these experiences. These two places, as much as I enjoyed them, also had downfalls. I'm far from family, a decent shopping experience (ha), and they throw at me some pretty hard times.

But, these two places have forever changed my life and I'm so grateful for that. I am able to be who I am because they shaped me and continue to. It was a true honor to be able to go to one of the greatest colleges in the US, and is a true honor to support my husband as a US Marine. Looking back, life has been extremely rewarding, but it's going to be so much more rewarding in the future.

2 years ago...

On this day my world came crashing down. My boyfriend of 11 months was leaving on his very first deployment. I thought it was possibly one of the worst things to happen to me. Looking back, it really was actually one of the best things to happen to us.

After that deployment, we got engaged and married, moved into our very first house, adopted a perfect puppy, and are surviving our second deployment. That deployment taught me to be a very strong, independent woman. I couldn't be surviving this deployment without the experience of the first. As bad as it sounds, I'm so glad we got to experience one before this one as a married couple.

It's been quite the ride with the Corps, and being separated for almost 3 years. Gosh, it felt like the 4 months we lived together we were apart, too! Let's just say, we've been long distance for 3 years. Well, that 3 years has taught me a lot. It brought me to where I am today. I am SO beyond grateful for the place I'm at in my life: I'm married to the most wonderful man, I have a puppy who is the light of our lives, and we live comfortably.

Yes, this all takes place when my husband is deployed. He's not going to be deployed forever, either. So, why does everyone get their panties in a bunch about deployments?  I just don't feel it necessary to put my life on hold because he's gone. I've learned to live without my husband, and he's learned to live without me. It's just what we do. I know it's his job and I've accepted that. We are an extremely strong couple, and knowing that also helps me make it through hard times.

For now,we both live separate lives, but in the end we'll be together and we're always bound by the sacred vows we took that remind us of forever. 

2 for 1! MilSpouse Survey

2 posts in one day! Woah! Haha, I'm so excited that I'm back. I can't wait to continue to write regularly. I hope to be able to share this with my handsome man when he gets back :) This is a survey that I've seen on a few MilSpouse blogs I follow! Heavy with pictures :P

How did you and your spouse meet?

We were 8 and 9 at the local little league field. My dad was his coach and my sister and brother played on the team. It was the Cardinals. My mom was then his fourth grade teacher the following year. Flash forward 10 years, I was working at CVS the year before my freshman year of college. A cute new guy was hired and I kinda had a crush on him. He was super sweet and I told my manager. She kept trying to hook us up, but he had a girlfriend. Said girlfriend broke up with him, and I looked forward to working with him every day even if we would only work together for an hour. We usually stocked the shelves in aisle 4 (hair care). He told me that summer he'd be going to boot camp and asked me to write, but he left and I never got the chance to write. 3 months later, I saw him at the mall and we rekindled our friendship. He ended up giving me the wrong phone number, but thanks to Facebook the rest is history!

 

 

 

 

How old were you when you two met?

The first time: I was 9, he was 8
Before dating: We were both 19 (he's 3 months younger than I am)

 

 

How long have you been together?

We've been together 3 years as of February 12th, and married almost 9 months.

 

Our first picture together!

 

 

 

Where are you and your spouse originally from?

We're both from the suburbs of Philadelphia, the same hometown, in fact.

 

How did you feel about him joining the military?

I tried to convince him not to join the "Army". Well he didn't really like that and corrected me saying, "It's the MARINE CORPS" and I would always say, "Yeah, Army, same thing". But I really tried to convince him otherwise. We didn't start dating until after he joined, though, so it didn't impact our relationship much.

 

 

Where did your spouse go to Basic Training?

He went to boot camp at MCRD Parris Island.

 

Has your spouse ever been deployed?

He deployed with the 24th MEU in 2010 and is currently on his second deployment.

Deployment #1 Send-off

Homecoming #1

Send-off #2

 

 

Ever been to his promotion ceremony?

Yes! It was my Christmas present in 2010 to see him get promoted to Cpl.

 

How long have you been a military wife?

8 months

Did you marry him before or after he joined?

After.

 

 

 

How did your husband propose?

He told me throughout the entire deployment that I had a surprise and it would come during post-deployment leave. Well it happened to be the second to last day of post-d leave and he told me that I would get it on the last day. That same day, we were preparing for a huge homecoming party at my house. He told me he wasn't feeling well and needed to go inside. He disappeared for a little and returned wearing his dress blue deltas and got down on one knee in front of about 75 people. There's video, but I don't have a link.

Where did you get married?

We got married at a country club in our hometown.

 

 

How old were you two when you got married?

We were both 21.

 

 

Did he wear his uniform on your wedding day?

He did :)

 

 

Where are you and your spouse currently stationed?

MCAS Cherry Point in Havelock, NC

 

Do you live on base?

We don't.

 

 

How long were you married when you had to go through your first separation?

We were married 2.5 months when he went to EMV, he deployed shortly after we were married for 6 months.

 

 

What is your favorite base so far?

We've only been stationed here at Cherry Point, but Camp Lejeune is pretty close. I like Cherry Point better than Camp Lejeune, less hustle and bustle.

Does your spouse look good in his uniform?

Very much so! He thinks he does, too.

 

Showing off his green belt.

 

Do you think military life is more advanced than civilian life?

Advanced? Maybe it has more challenges. Involuntary separation, long hours, etc. But I wouldn't say it's more advanced. I will say I go through more that 99% of the entire US population goes through.

Do you like the benefits you receive as a military dependent?

Yes and no, I can appreciate that I don't pay medical bills. However, coming from a PPO and this is not to sound entitled or anything, but a PPO is much better than the HMO we receive. If I were to receive the PPO offered by the military, I'd be paying A LOT out of pocket. I chose the lesser of the two evils.

Do you have a lot of military wife friends?

Why yes, I most certainly do! I have a lot of friends, period.

 

 

What is the hardest part of being a military wife?

Any type of involuntary separation. I would also say the pay and the way some people look at the military is ridiculous. I wish so much more for these men and women who sacrifice everything so others don't have to.

 

 

Do you own any military wife stuff?

Negative.

Do you support your spouse as a member of the military?

Every single day.

 

 

 

Soon enough

We're at that point in the deployment where we can say soon and it really does mean soon enough. I'm so excited to say we're not halfway there yet, but I am writing! Hey, hopefully this will start becoming something that I can write in more than just every few months. I'm looking forward to it.

I don't want to say that this deployment has been easy, because it certainly hasn't, but it hasn't been bad. It's actually going much better than I thought it would. I truly mean that. I have been able to Skype with my husband almost daily. He even got the day off for my surgery to be able to see me before and even after! I was so happy he was able to do that.

Speaking of... I don't have my gallbladder anymore. Chronic cholesistitis does not exist in my body anymore! Surgery went great, and I made it home for the holidays and enjoyed them very much. It was great to spend time with my family. Oliver loved being with his family, too! He didn't want to leave. We had a few trips to the ER because I was still in pain from my surgery, but hopefully that's taken care of now. Since then, we've officially made it through the hardest part of the deployment!!!

Now, Ollie and I are snuggled up on the couch and watching reruns of One Tree Hill on Netflix. Highly recommend the series. Anyway, Dan's day off is tomorrow, so we hope that he can talk to us a little more than usual. I am so excited that we have the opportunity to do this. Being long distance for 2.5 years definitely gave us some experience at this, as well as sort of what to expect. I can't wait to say I've officially kicked deployment butt!

And we're off... 3 weeks later

The dreaded d-word began almost 3 weeks ago. I can't believe it's already been 3 weeks. I also can't believe that it's been 3 months since I've written on here! Where has time gone? If I write every 3 months, I'll be writing at halfway through the deployment then again after homecoming with the track I'm on. I keep telling myself I'll get back into blogging, but keeping myself busy and not reflecting on the deployment makes more sense to me right now. It's just another thing to pass the time when I'm not running on high octane fuel.
I have actually been handling it much better than I expected. Our relationship has been strengthened more than I could ever imagine by having to deal with this. Just the fact that I am able to do this and hold down the homefront amazes me. I have never been what I like to call a truly independent person; however, when forced into the situation, I persevered. EMV did not feel like it went this fast and it was about 4 and a half weeks long. I can't imagine that 6 months will even feel long if time continues to move at the pace it is.

This deployment has showed me that time really is relative. I could make it go SO slow if I just sat at home and moped about the fact that my husband is not only missing our first married Thanksgiving, Christmas, New Years, Ollie's birthday (haha, yes I love my furbaby), our together anniversary for the 3rd year in a row, Valentine's day for the 4th year in a row, my stepbrother's wedding, and our very first anniversary. Good thing it's the paper anniversary and I have already planned my paper present for when he gets home.

The thing that I think I am having the most difficult time dealing with is the fact that I am going to need surgery to remove my gallbladder and Dan will be missing that, as well. I'm completely ok with it and have tossed around the idea of going home so many times, but this is something I have to do here. It would just create an even bigger hassle if I went home. I'm glad I made the decision to stay here, I think it shows that I can truly be independent. I do have my sister hopefully coming down when I get it done, if not I have so many friends who have offered to help me, it's wonderful. I will have an update about the date of surgery tomorrow.

Other than knowing I will want Dan when I get out of surgery, everything else is going well. I've been able to talk to him more in the almost 3 weeks that he's been gone than in the 7 months he was deployed last year. That in itself has made me so grateful that I sorta had expectations going into this deployment and they were completely thrown away. It really does help that we have been through this before. I don't want to say it's easier, obviously it isn't, but I do know what to expect and how to handle things and how NOT to handle them. Thankfully, that deployment was a growing experience for us as this is, too.

I can't wait to be back in my amazing husband's arms. We got to Skype today and it was great! Totally worth the waiting 2 weeks to see that man's mustache ridden face. I can't say I don't like it though, he's quite the handsome man, but I know I'm a little biased. Hopefully, tomorrow brings the same type of Skype call, but I appreciate any communication even if that means an email!

Big green weenie strikes again

I know, I know: Semper Gumby is the motto of a Marine wife. But, of course, I'm one of those people who gets really excited about the little things and my mind being stuck that Saturday was our big day. I just kept thinking, "I deserve this, he'll be home on the first flight. A month later for a birthday celebration is ok, right?" WRONG.

The big green weenie has struck again. I will be waiting until sunrise on Sunday morning to welcome my husband home. A lovely twelve whole hours after all of my friends welcome their husbands home. While they're nestled in their beds, I'll be waiting anxiously at the squadron. At least the outcome is worth it.

I feel like we always have the worst luck with the Marine Corps. If it wasn't painful enough for them to leave on my birthday, it's more painful to have my friends text me to make sure I know that my husband isn't coming home with theirs on Saturday, but he will, in fact, be coming home on Sunday. Well thanks for the big slap in the face. It stings pretty bad.

I understand it's a whopping 12 hours less that I get with my husband, but for being messed around with so much, isn't there anything that can make up for it? Yes, it would be getting the past three years of waiting on pins and needles back. However, that won't happen. We won't get these times spent apart back. I won't get to spend as much time with my husband as I'd like before he leaves for a seven month deployment.

There is something we get out of it though...

We get to be together forever, no more involuntary separation after the Marine Corps. We get to be an extremely strong couple who has gone through more than many, many couples have ever gone through. In fact, we will have gone through more than 99% of relationships, since the military wife makes up less than 1% of the population in the United States. We get a reunion: that first hug, kiss, all your worries for the past 7 months gone in an instant. For that, I am extremely grateful and I know we will overcome anything the Corps throws at us, especially deployment.

I've got a newfound faith today, remembering that 1 year ago on this day I was welcoming my then boyfriend home from deployment. It was the happiest day of my life. So much has changed since then, but I know it's for the better. I am now a Marine wife. I now live 500 miles away from my family. I, again, have something to look forward to in 3 days and in 9 months (ha, ha, not prego! Just homecoming :P ). Most of all, I know that I made the right choice in this lifestyle, because it's the reunion that makes the title of "Marine wife" worth while.

Time flies when...

You work and make plans every day, so much that you don't even know what day it is. I obviously know today is Sunday, thanks to my phone. But, earlier in the week I realized that the days just seem to blend together and go really fast when you have something to keep you occupied at all times.

We pretty much dominated this work up! So glad that it's almost over. I actually got to FaceTime with my handsome hubby yesterday morning. He has a very ugly mustache, but thankfully it'll be gone when he gets back.

Work has been great! I got a review from my supervisor that said I am doing an excellent job! I am so excited to be working, when especially I know that I couldn't find a job this good at home. I just hope to keep up the good work.

Nothing much other than that has been going on. Today, I got a call from my sister that my grandmother (my almost 85-year-old grandmother who still works) took a fall and they were taking her to the hospital. Well come to find out she's getting emergency surgery on her elbow because she fractured it. This is the first time in 45 years that she has been to the doctor. She doesn't believe in them. If you could spare her a few prayers that would be wonderful! She's a very strong woman and I know she will recover fully!

My Danny comes home on Saturday. Oliver coincidentally has a hair cut that day and I feel like I'll be running around like a mad woman trying to get things situated. It'll be fun! Tomorrow, I'm going to get a dress for our dining out with my friend Kate! I can't wait to find something that I like :)

Hope this finds you all well and those going through deployments, you rock! I realized how fast this month has gone by and I can't wait to kick real deplyoment butt!